DESPERATE TO UPGRADE HUSBAND?

Computers?  I love'em.  Is it that women are better than men at using them?  More patient when it comes to trouble-shooting?  I know quite a few men who leave their wives to book the holidays, print out the family photos etc.

In the early days of computers I remember the times when I needed help and the men (and there were only men) quickly high-tailed it out the office!

But this (internet) letter from our friend Bob, made me laugh!  It is Good Medicine for when you are tired of trying to bring your husband into the 21st century!

The Lady in Rosslyn Chapel Window is Prepared to Offer Up Her iPad

 
Tech Support 
Letter

  

Dear Tech Support,

 

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slowdown in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewellery applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0. In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as: NBA 5.0, NFL 3.0 and Golf Clubs 4.1.
 


Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and House cleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.
 


What can I do?
 


Signed, Desperate

 

Dear Desperate,

 

First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system. Please enter command: I thought you loved me.html and try to download Tears 6.2. Do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.

 

However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1. Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Farting and Snoring Loudly Beta version. Whatever you do, DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Mother-In-Law 1.0 as it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.

 

In addition, please do not attempt to re-install the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.  In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Cooking 3.0.



Good Luck!



 

MISCELLANEOUS PICK-ME-UPS

When in need of a pick-me-up nothing does it like flowers. Here is a bouquet that Maggie made for her No. 2 son's wedding in Argyllshire last weekend.  The white heather is from my garden. 

In addition to this she made other bouquets plus posies arranged in 4 jam jars per table in the centre of the 10 tables at the reception.

This solitary sweet pea is the last of one group of sweet peas in my garden.  The peas I bought in their shells at the supermarket One of life's pleasures is sitting outside on the back step shelling peas.

And as I was needing a laugh today... here are 2 miscellaneous items that have been sitting in my 'Sandbox' awaiting the next blog to be posted.

Letter from the Tooth Fairy ... and a novel solution to an age-old problem.  However I hate to tell this mum that it never gets any better...

And finally I just love this one!  I think it came from Jane Hunter in Kelowna who sends me these from time to time. 

THREENAGER

I was talking to a young mum in the park behind our house recently.  When I asked her the ages of her children she said she had one who was "a threeanger"!  That was a new one on me ... a three year old who has acts and has the attitude of a teenager.

We have one of those ... her name is Harriet!  John's recent photos say it all!

 

Harriet and Indy riding on the bumper cars on holiday in Portland, Oregon.

 Harriet in downtown Portland.

Cannon Beach visit to the ice-cream factory.

 Cannon Beach

 

 The Columbia River Maritime Museum, Astoria, Oregon

GLASGOW FLOWERS AROUND THE CITY

Sweet peas outside Cottier's Theatre, Hyndland Road

 Sweet peas in the walled garden at House for an Art Lover, Bellahouston Park

 

Memorial bouquet of roses on the bench in the walled garden

Begonias in public walkway, Cumbernauld Town Centre

Fireweed in derelict ground opposite The Tramway, Pollokshields Road

IN PRAISE OF BLUE

I like this colour of blue.  It is lapis lazuli and is seen in church painting and stain glass windows.

Kelvingrove Art Gallery examples. 

  Lapis Lazuli [Wikipedia]

In the RGB color wheel it is "azure" (Hex #007FFF)

 

From out disply coffee table collection we have ... not Lapis Lazuli ... but some Labradorite.  We obtained it nearly 50 years ago when on an mountaineering expedition in Labrador with Jim Messer.

Labradorite label side from our coffee table.